aaaaannnnnd breathe.
These past few weeks have been a whirlwind. Planning planning planning.
SIDEBAR: DEAR GOD, I SWEAR I WILL NEVER HAVE A WEDDING. THAT WORD WILL BE BANNED FROM THE VOCABULARY OF ANY MARRAIGE-LIKE EVENT I MAY HAVE.
annnnnd breathe again.
Having a bit of trouble finding time for myself (or work for that matter.) My sister is not stressed which is FANTASTIC. Unfortunately I am. But only two more weeks and then I am free again to move wherever and be with whomever.
Speaking of whomever…still talking often to shy guy. I am still going through the motions and remaining somewhat disconnected from it all in the process, like I am watching it from outside going, “seriously, this cannot be happening.” Preposterous! But…it does seem to be happening and it is looking like I will be returning and am presently applying for a visa- which by the way is a pain in the ass- how could they not want me???
I am still preparing myself for the worst case scenario, as this is generally the ONLY scenario I ever see. I suppose this is a way to protect myself or a form of realism, I don’t know. But needless to say, I was a little shocked when shy guy suggested that I live with him when I come back. I’m still getting used to the idea that he wants me to come back, let alone plans to talk to me when I get there. How will he freak out and pretend he doesn’t know me if I am in his bed?
Still holding out for the possibility of a freakout on his part- like I said, worst case scenario.
But excited about a possible new chapter of my life as well…or I would be if you could get me to admit that it is actually happening.
