Sometimes I’m just bored. Looking for the next adventure. I don’t know why. Since moving back here, I’ve lost 10lbs, my health is more stable, i move slower and am generally more at peace. Personally, I’m pursuing and on the path to achieving the goals I have set for myself. But somehow, still bored. Needing flash and adventure. The next high.
I’ve always been like this. Even right now, i’m watching a movie, downloading a new program, twittering and writing on here. I can never seem to really just settle and enjoy where I am at. Never fully at rest.
Things with the guy are…fine I guess. I still haven’t figured out if I am having casual futureless sex or if I am quasi-dating the strangest, most freakish person I have ever met. One thing I can be almost certain of is that it is more than likely to fail. Going nowhere fast. Well going nowhere slowly it feels like. Boring.
There is a part of me that thinks I should bail out now, and perhaps I am only there because I’m afraid to move forward (again) and don’t want to deal with the boredom. Does it matter if he gives a shit if he never has the balls to admit it? At the end of the day, the answer is the same.
